Does he have a sexual background way different from hers? I think there can be issues when people are dating people because of a big age gap. You may be unwittingly seeing that a guy who is single at 30 as a bit of a red flag-- because it's a bit unusual for Mormon guys to make it to 30 still single-- so you might be unconsciously wondering if there is an issue that makes him not great relationship material. There is one downside I can think of that's worth being aware of: Keeping it secret from parents and employers may make it seem more mysterious and appealing than it would be if they were able to have a "normal" relationship. It didn't work out well, but I'm not sure the age difference was really our biggest problem. I don't think "I am pretty sure if this guy were 40 a lot more people would have felt the same apprehension" is true. Whereas if she waits and the relationship doesn't work out, then it will all seem a lot scarier when it seems like everyone else her age has already had those experiences. The relationships are healthy. For example, a year old with a year old is not going to seem such a big deal. Because if it's a relationship that works out in the long term, she might learn some valuable things from not going right from living with your parents to living with a boyfriend.
Thank you all for your responses, which have helped me learn more about what is considered healthy and normal by average folks. Not a red flag However, This means that a 16 year old may date a 13 year old, and I'm just not OK with that. I'm glad I found him, but I'm also glad I had the experience of dating casually when I was younger. You're you, and she's her. Once I hit his age, I was all, "Why the fuck did he date a year-old? You live and learn and live and learn. If you're a woman dating a much older guy, you can easily end up in a very slightly parent-child-like dynamic, where he makes more decisions after all, he has much more life experience! Parents are a lot less likely to find out what a child's sex life is like when the child doesn't live at home. Make sure she's thinking consciously about what she wants to accomplish in the next 5 years or so graduate school? There is so much on the line here; I think the age difference is not the biggest concern. I think there can be issues when people are dating people because of a big age gap. February 14, 2: Eventually they broke up, obviously, but she turned out ok. My husband is 16 years older than I am and we're as well matched as two peas in a pod. Who's career will take precedence in regards to things like moving - it might end up being th person more established in their which would tend to be the older partner. There can be subtle signs that a less experienced person may not pick up on when assessing someone-- or a person that's all hopped up on lovey feelings wouldn't notice. He treats her very well and with a lot of respect and kindness. I speak from experience. My husband is 6 years older than me, and we met when I was I do worry that she's perhaps jeopardizing her current living situation due to point 2. If things "go wrong" and relationship ends, then she'll learn and grow from that. She needs to tread lightly, and perhaps investigate the possibility of moving out before she's forced out. For example, a year old with a year old is not going to seem such a big deal. Her husband is 14 years older than she is. However it sounds from your post like you haven't actually met this fellow.
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